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CMB was constantly "gently" reminding me to message users I'd matched with.
Changes in the last year have made Ok Cupid a bit more like Tinder, focusing more on swiping and eliminating the ability to message a user without matching with them first.
You can still send a message -- it just won't show up in the recipient's inbox unless you match.
Because who doesn't enjoy sending a thoughtful message to someone who might never see it?
However, Ok Cupid has pointed out that these changes did help lower the number of offensive messages users received, which might be a worthwhile trade-off.
Of course, some of us are trying to meet new people, far removed from our everyday lives.